


Figuratively Speaking

by zebraljb



Category: Lord of the Rings RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-10
Updated: 2011-12-10
Packaged: 2017-10-27 03:47:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/291295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zebraljb/pseuds/zebraljb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There were "action figures" made of all the members of the Fellowship. So what if Orlando has the Ranger above his bed?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Figuratively Speaking

FIGURATIVELY SPEAKING

 

It was all Dom’s fault. The little lush had decided he needed to sleep in Orlando’s bed, and nowhere else. Actually, he had decided that both he AND Billy needed to sleep there. It was the weekend party, this time at Orlando’s place. Elijah and Sean were on the floor in the living room. Sean Bean and Viggo had left early, clearly not interested in getting drunk this weekend. Sir Ian had made a polite appearance, but had also left early. So there was a semi-sober Orlando, helping an almost-passed-out Billy and not-much-better Dominic up his steps. Ever the gracious host, Orlando had sighed and agreed when Dom had announced that Orlando didn’t need a whole bed. He could sleep on the sofa in the living room. Billy and Dom should have the bed.

“You’re a good mate,” Billy slurred, his head lolling down as they tripped up the steps.

“You’ll be hating the whole world tomorrow,” Orlando told him. “Here’s the door…no…to your right…there ya go.”

“Pull off my shoes, wouldya?” Billy said, flopping onto the bed face first. Orlando sighed, making a mental note to collect on this ever-growing debt some time in the near future.

Dom was at least able to pull off his own shoes, socks and pants before climbing on the bed as well. “Hey…what’s this?” He reached up onto the shelf above the headboard.

“Put that away.” Orlando grabbed for it, but Dominic was shockingly agile in his intoxicated state.

“Is this…Viggo?”

“No. It’s Aragorn. There are figurines of all of us somewhere. I think you Hobbits are in the dining room.” Orlando grabbed again.

“But why is VIGGO above your bed. Does he watch you get off…or…wait…do you hold him when you do it?”

“DOM.” Orlando successfully got the figurine away from Dominic. “Go…to…BED.”

Dom giggled and lay back down. “You want him. You want Viggo. You want to…”

Orlando shut the door behind him. He looked down at the figurine in his hand, lightly tracing the strong, handsome face. Peter had gotten figurines for them all, and Orlando did have them all over his house. He told himself that Aragorn just happened to accidentally come to rest above the bed. He ignored the fact that he talked to Viggo’s replica every morning while getting ready to go on-set. He ignored the fact that he talked to it when he got back from the set, worn out and just plain exhausted. He also ignored the fact that sometimes, when he was quite drunk, he kissed the figurine.

 

“Didya know that Orli has some sort of toy fetish?” Dom asked Billy as they sat down in the makeshift commissary.

“What’re ya talkin’ about?” Billy said, his mouth full of bread. “I could eat a cow…still walking…or maybe a rhino.”

“Ya always think of your stomach, you pig,” Dom said, rolling his eyes. “Anyway, I saw it. When we slept there. He has a toy of Viggo above his bed…it watches him do EVERYTHING, if ya know what I mean.”

“Nasty.” Billy chewed thoughtfully. “Why him? Why not us? Our toys are much more realistic.”

“You idiot, aren’t ya hearin’ me?” Dom almost yelled. “He’s into that kinky shit.”

“Hmmm…doesn’t look like the kinky type,” Billy said. “But Viggo? Really?”

 

Later that day, Orlando was doing some stretches near the set when Viggo walked over. “I have something for you, back in the trailer.”

“For me?” Orlando swallowed the sudden lump in his throat and tried to smile normally. There was a consistent lump in his throat and his pants whenever Viggo talked to him lately. For someone who had always considered himself straight, Orlando was quickly coming to terms with the fact that he had perpetual lust for Viggo. And Viggo was SO not someone he ever thought he’d feel attracted to. Viggo was quiet and serious and distant. NOT Orlando’s type.

“Yeah, for you…it’s a book of photographs…extreme sports stuff. Got it in town at the bookstore.” Viggo shrugged. “It looked like something you might like.”

“Damn, Vig, thanks,” Orlando said, surprised. “Thoughtful of you.”

Viggo shrugged again and walked away. Orlando looked down at the ground and tried not to smile.

 

“Look at him.” Billy threw an arm around Sean’s shoulders as he motioned to Orlando. “Flexible as all get out.”

“Need I say euuww?” Sean said, wrinkling his nose. “I don’t like to think about how flexible other men are.”

“He’s into that…kinky shit with other men. Toys and all.” Billy nodded as Sean gaped at him. “You’d never know, would ya? And apparently, he’s all about kinky shit with Viggo.”

“Viggo? But he’s…and he has a…” Sean blinked hard.

“It’s okay, Sean. I know. I wouldn’t expect it from Orlando, either. But, you know, he’s never really been around movies and all. I just hope Viggo’s kind to him.” Billy sighed a resentful sigh.

 

“’Lij, oh, man.” Sean waddled as fast as his hobbit feet would let him. “I have to tell you this…God…I dunno if I can say it.”

“Relax, Sean.” Elijah gave him a smile.

“Look at them,” Sean scoffed. They looked over to where Orlando was stretching and Viggo was squatting down talking to him. “Probably planning their next rendezvous.”

“Sean, what the hell are you talking about?” Elijah stared at him curiously.

“Viggo and Orlando. They’re like…fuck buddies. They use toys and all kinds of stuff.”

“Are they involved?”

“I don’t know. I just know they do…stuff.” Sean waved a hand, obviously uncomfortable.

“Well, if they care about each other, than why do WE care?” Elijah asked.

“I don’t care. It’s just that…Billy said…”

“You’re believing gossip?” Elijah asked, and Sean blushed. “I’m getting to the bottom of this.” Elijah walked over to Orlando, just as Viggo walked away. “Vig,” Elijah said, nodding to him. Viggo nodded back. “Um, Orlando? Can I talk to you?”

“Sure, Elijah.” Orlando sprang to his feet. “What’s up?”

“I was just wondering…um…what was going on between you and Viggo?”

“Me and Viggo?” Orlando felt his face burn.

“If you’re into…guys…you know, that’s cool. I just hope…that you’re not just doing this because you’re lonely, and because he’s into the same…things…you are.”

“Things?”

“Like…toys…or whatever…”

A light bulb went off in Orlando’s head, and he made a mental note to kick a certain hobbit’s ass from New Zealand to the North Pole. “Elijah, I am not gay.” Orlando took a deep breath and tried to remain calm and elf-like. “I also would NOT get with Viggo if I WAS gay. He’s an old, frigid man, twice my age. He probably couldn’t even keep it up.”

“Oh, okay, because I…” Elijah stopped talking as Orlando’s face went from beet red to pale white in a heartbeat. Elijah turned to see Viggo standing not too far away from them. Obviously, Orlando’s voice had carried.

“Where did you hear this?” Orlando whispered.

“From Sean.”

“Okay.” Orlando walked away, heading for the next hobbit in line. As he walked past Viggo, he tried to ignore what looked like pain in the older man’s eyes. “Sean?”

“Heard it from Billy,” Sean said quickly. Orlando turned on one heel. Billy and Dom were sitting at a table together. They saw him approaching and stopped eating altogether.

“God, Orli…you look like ya got a bobcat in your breeches,” Billy said, laughing.

“What the hell have you two been saying?”

“Dom said you use toys with Viggo,” Billy said quickly.

“I didn’t say that! I said he had a toy of Viggo above his bed,” Dom retorted. “Orli…”

“Leave me alone.” Orlando wanted to run to his trailer, but Peter called them back on-set.

 

When Orlando finally made it back to his trailer, the first thing he saw was a book wrapped in brown paper. He groaned and flopped onto his chair. It was the book from Viggo. Viggo, who he had insulted in front of everyone. Viggo, who had looked hurt and…disappointed? Orlando quickly changed clothes, threw the book into his bag, and ran out of the trailer before anyone could stop him.

 

Orlando bit at his bottom lip as he rang the doorbell. Viggo looked surprised when he opened the door, dressed only in paint-splattered jeans. “’Lando?”

“You’re the only person who calls me that,” Orlando said, smiling nervously.

“It suits you.” Viggo opened the door and Orlando stepped in.

“Was I interrupting anything?”

Viggo shook his head. “Just painting. What’s up?”

“I wanted to…apologize…for today. I got caught up in this rumor mill, and I had to put an end to it. What I do in my own home, and who I do it with, is no one’s business.”

“You were embarrassed.”

“Kinda.” Orlando rubbed at the back of his neck. “Anyway, I wanted to apologize.”

“You’re not interested in me, right?” Viggo said. “Because you’re not gay or anything.”

“I…” Orlando stared into Viggo’s eyes. “Why do you ask?”

“Come here.” Viggo took Orlando by the hand and led him into his makeshift studio. “Wanna see what I’m working on?”

Viggo removed a sheet from a canvas, and Orlando stared at his own face. Dozens of small drawings and paintings of himself, either in street clothes, or as Legolas. Pictures of him laughing, eating, sitting, even sleeping. “Oh,” Orlando said, surprised.

“I’m not gay, either,” Viggo said. “But I AM interested in you. But, you know, I see now that it was ridiculous for me to ever think…anyway. I just wanted you to know that it’s no big deal.”

“I…” Orlando looked at himself once more, then turned his eyes back to Viggo. Viggo looked so handsome and strong, with paint streaks on his chest. “I have a figurine of you above my bed,” he said suddenly. “I talk to you…a lot. Dom found it, and started this rumor.”

“Well, just for the record, I may be much older than you, but I can indeed still get it up, and I’m NOT frigid.” Viggo’s tone was kind.

“You’re so distant,” Orlando said softly.

“I have to be. I’m the King,” Viggo said, smiling. “I also can’t let the world know how much I care about my co-worker.”

“I’m so sorry!” Orlando blurted. “I never meant to hurt you. I saw it in your eyes, and I felt like shit.”

“It’s okay, ‘Lando, really,” Viggo promised. Without realizing, the two had moved closer together.

“I think about you all the time,” Orlando finally admitted. “When you talk to me, I get a lump the size of Australia in my throat.”

Viggo took Orlando’s hand. “Have you ever…”

“Not really. I kissed some guys…hello…theater brat here…” Orlando said with a weak smile. “But nothing like this.”

“What do you tell me? The toy me, I mean.” Viggo’s voice was husky in Orlando’s ear.

“I tell you about my day…and sometimes…when I’m lonely…I tell you how much I want you, how much I wish…” Orlando took a shuddering breath as he felt Viggo’s mouth by his ear.

“You can have whatever you wish.”

Orlando closed his eyes and allowed his hand to rest on Viggo’s bare side. He felt the sinews of Viggo’s muscles and sighed. “Whoa,” he said weakly, opening his eyes again.

“Unless you don’t want anything at all.” Viggo drew back, looking Orlando in the eye. “Unless you just wanted to apologize, and you want us to just be friends.”

“You mean…you want more?”

In reply, Viggo pulled Orlando against him. His hands slid up over Orlando’s shorn head. “You need to grow some hair,” Viggo murmured before kissing him. He substituted grabbing Orlando’s backside for grabbing at his non-existent hair. Orlando’s lips eagerly parted, and Viggo moaned as he deepened the kiss. “Yes, I want more,” Viggo said when he finally came up for breath. “I want more than just this, too…but right now…this is all I can think about.”

“Me, too, though it scares me to death,” Orlando admitted. His world was spinning, and he had to grab onto Viggo’s shoulders to steady himself. The world still spun, though. Viggo wanted him.

“I would never do anything to hurt you.” Orlando felt thumbs caressing his cheekbones.

“I’ve already hurt you,” Orlando said unhappily.

“Already forgotten.” Viggo looked down at himself. “I need a shower before we can continue this.”

“I’ll come with you,” Orlando said immediately, and Viggo raised an eyebrow. Orlando blushed. “I mean…I…”

“I do need someone to get those hard to reach places,” Viggo teased, and Orlando grinned his old cocky grin.

“I have long arms.”

“Is that all that’s long?”

Orlando felt himself harden immediately at the huskiness of Viggo’s voice. “Not right now,” Orlando replied.

Viggo took his hand again and led him from the studio. They went to the master bathroom, Viggo grabbing extra towels along the way. “Do you ever undress my figurine?” Viggo asked. Orlando laughed.

“The clothes are painted on. Besides, no matter WHAT Dominic thinks, I didn’t DO anything with your figurine.”

“Good. Now you can do it all with the real thing.” Viggo had started to undress as they talked, and suddenly he was naked. Orlando swallowed deeply, suddenly nervous and unsure. He could jump off a bridge, connected only by a piece of glorified elastic, but this was the most scared he had ever been in his life. Viggo was strong and toned and dark and beautiful. Orlando’s eyes couldn’t get enough of him. “I’m feeling underdressed.”

“Oh, right.” Orlando pulled his shirt off. “Um, V?”

“Mmmhmm?” Viggo said absently, running a hand along Orlando’s bicep.

“How many men have you…I mean, are you really…”

“Every member of the Fellowship,” Viggo said with a straight face. “Twice with Sean Astin. You’re the icing on my cake.”

“What?” Orlando dropped his shirt and Viggo burst out laughing.

“Kidding. I’ve had a few…relationships. Obviously I keep things quiet. But this…it’s more than just sex, ‘Lando, I promise.”

“Okay.” Orlando fumbled with his belt.

“And you don’t even have to get into that shower with me. You could go watch TV or something until I’m done.”

“No way,” Orlando whispered, finally naked.

“Good God,” Viggo whispered. “You may not even make it into the shower.” Orlando’s reply was to step into the large shower stall, grinning broadly.

“Let’s get you clean.”

Orlando simply leaned against the shower wall and watched as Viggo soaped himself over. Viggo silently handed him the sponge, and Orlando massaged Viggo’s back with broad, deep strokes. Viggo moaned every time Orlando swiped the sponge down. When Orlando tentatively swiped the sponge around front, Viggo’s moan echoed through the shower. “You…” Viggo turned around, pulling Orlando to him. Water streamed over them both as Viggo grabbed Orlando at the waist, rubbing against him. Orlando gasped for breath, almost choking. “Want to taste you, ‘Lando…can I?”

“Y-Y-Yes,” Orlando said, his teeth almost chattering as Viggo slid down to the floor of the shower, his tongue lapping a trail down Orlando’s stomach as he went. Orlando let his head fall back, his hands clenching and unclenching in thin air. Viggo lapped quickly at the head before totally taking Orlando’s cock into his mouth. He hummed quietly as he moved over the sensitive skin, his hands massaging Orlando’s ass.

“Beautiful…taste so good…” Orlando heard Viggo say. Orlando could hardly believe what was happening. Even in his most X-rated dreams, it hadn’t felt this good. And to top it all off, Viggo CARED about him. He had said so. This wasn’t some girl off the street, giving him head behind a bar. This was Viggo. Viggo.

“V…” Orlando panted as every bit of blood and energy in his body suddenly pooled in his cock. “V…gonna…”

“Yes, baby…” Viggo whispered, his hand working with his mouth. Orlando’s head hit the wall of the stall with a crack as he came.

“Fuck…” Orlando gasped. Viggo stood and pulled Orlando to him, supporting his weight.

“You okay?”

“Yeah…dizzy…” Orlando said, clutching at Viggo’s shoulders.

“Maybe that was too fast,” Viggo said, biting at his bottom lip.

“Perfect tempo for me,” Orlando panted. Viggo smiled.

“No, I mean…we just kinda came out to each other today, and here I am blowing you in the shower.”

“Wouldn’t THAT be a great rumor to start?” Orlando asked, and Viggo smiled again. “You need to smile more often.”

“Maybe now I will,” Viggo said, and Orlando shivered with happiness. “You get cleaned up and dressed. I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Okay,” Orlando said, but not before they shared one more long kiss.

 

“Ya look like someone ran you over, Orli,” Elijah commented. “You’re not still upset, are you? I never shoulda said anything.”

“I was just up late last night. It’s okay.” Orlando kissed the top of Elijah’s head, shocking him. “It wasn’t your fault. Sean’s, either. And don’t worry. Things are all worked out between me and Viggo.” He looked across the makeup trailer at his lover, who winked at him in the mirror.

“Ohmygosh.” Sean came hurrying through the door. “Did you hear? There are little pairs of Merry and Pippin dolls, all over the set…in all kinds of nasty sexual positions!”

“I didn’t know Bill and Dom were like that,” Orlando said with a straight face.

“Me either! It’s kinda disgusting…but I’m gonna see if I can find more.” Sean darted out again.

“It’s like an X-rated Easter Egg hunt or something,” Elijah said, laughing. “Good on ya, Orli.”

“Yeah, good on me,” Orlando said, smiling at Viggo’s face reflected in the mirror.

THE END


End file.
